这是一年中最酸爽的时节，亲戚们攒了一整年的问题都准备在这个时候向你开炮。这些听着让你耳朵生茧的问题如今已经“美名远播”，连老外都知道的一清二楚。这个猴年，你被盘问了吗？

1. “Are you dating anyone？”

“有对象了没？”

We’re Facebook friends, grandma. You already know the answer to this.

我们只是脸书好友（朋友圈点赞关系）而已啦奶奶。这我已经回答过你啦。

2. “Whatever happened to [insert your ex’s name here]？”

“（你前任的名字）最近怎么样了？”

3. “How has the weight loss been going？”

“减肥减得怎样了？”

Sorry, can’t hear you over the sound of pie.

不好意思，派挡住了，听不见你在说什么。

4. “Can you figure out how to get our iPhones to do [something that’s either basic, or actually impossible]？”

“帮忙看看怎么让这个iPhone（要么是很简单的操作，要么是不可能的）行么？”

Please stop trying to put the USB plug into the wall socket, ma.

妈，别再把USB插口往墙头插座插啦。

5. “If I got you a gym membership, would you use it？”

“要是我给你一张健身房会员卡，你会用吗？”

6. “Do you need money？”

“你需要钱么？”

I do, and I completely hate myself for it.

要啊!真是好讨厌自己这一点。

7.“Are you and [your SO] ever planning on getting married？”

“你和你男/女朋友啥时候结婚？”

This question is twice as fun when your SO is in the room.

要是你的TA也在场，那画面就更美好了。

8.“I hear your Twitter is hilarious. Can I follow you？”

“听说你的微博很有趣，可以粉你吗？”

Sure, let me just delete everything on it.

当然可以，让我删掉所有东西先~

9. “How is your job going/how have your grades been？”

“最近工作/学习怎样啊？”

BRB（Be right back.）

我先拜了，马上回来~~

10. “When do you plan on giving us grandchildren？”

“打算什么时候给我们生孙子孙女啊？”

If you ask for that one more time, we are turning around this car and going straight home, mom.

妈你要是再问一次，我们马上开车掉头回家。

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